I'm hoping other women can relate to this post so it doesn't just come off as piteous and delusional. . .
Does it ever seem to you like there are three different yous, appearance-wise? There is the me I can see looking down--arms, tummy, legs--the me I see in the mirror, and the me in photographs.
Recently, I lost about 10 lbs. It was hard work, involving an increased exercise regimen and lots of diet changes. The me looking-down and the me-in-the-mirror have definitely noticed. The looking-down me saw that I had to buy new pants because my others hung off me awkwardly. The mirror me saw fewer rolls of back fat.
Evidently, the photo me has not noticed at all. Looking through recent pictures we've taken, I look just as blimpy as ever. No matter how hard I tried to look good--and the looking-down me and mirror-me assured me that I did look good--the photo-me is there as seemingly unimpeachable evidence that nothing has changed. Bryan, trying to comfort me, claims that I am just the most unphotogenic person he's ever met. This is thin comfort, even on the days that I believe it.
Bryan has gone so far as to insist that there's an impish not-Ellie that jumps in and takes my place whenever a flash goes off. He compares it to an episode of his favorite TV show How I Met Your Mother where the character Barney (Neil Patrick Harris, formerly Doogie Howser) is found to be photogenic no matter what. His friends try to take pictures of him at awful moments--bending down, with food on his face--and somehow the camera still captures him with a glinting smile and GQ pose, regardless of what he was doing when the picture was snapped. So Bryan's theory is that I'm the opposite of Barney.
Anyway, my point is, if I look awful in those recent pictures (and I do), the looking-down Ellie and mirror-Ellie's didn't look that way. Illusion or not, I'm clinging to their version of reality.
Anybody else out there have split-body-identities?
7 comments:
uggh. constantly having that problem. but YAY on the minus ten pounds..that is awesome. i know how hard anything is to lose, so good job, REGARDLESS of what the silly camera says.:)
All I can say (and I've already told you this) is that I thought you looked fabulous in your Cincinnati pictures. And...the Ellie I see looks great. I see a difference in you.
My photo-Anna is an inconsistent little sprite as well, though. And again, I would happily join you in petitioning the removal from circulation of that photo Bryan took of us at Hocking Hills. It's a mockery to what we've accomplished. :)
Hmmm. Maybe take all of your pictures using a mirror?
I am sure you look great but I will tell you for sure this weekend.
I, too, am having image problems. I have considered blogging about it but we'll see.
Yes, it is a common problem. I remember feeling so good about losing a lot of baby weight, only to see myself in a picture and hardly recognize that it was me.
You do look fabulous in person!
What in the heck are you talking about? I was looking through your pictures earlier and was honestly thinking how good you looked. Especially in the one where you're sitting down in your purple shirt. That being said, I agree whole-heartedly with you. I look at pictures of me and think, "seriously did I just stick my gut out and make sure that my tight pants were right on top of that gut creating a multiple gut effect because, yeah, not flattering." So no you are not alone and yes you look fantastic.
I, on the other hand, always look hot and sexy. Always.
Bryan
I have a slightly different problem. The me in the mirror, pictures, and looking down changes daily. Sometimes hourly. I can't even bring myself to look in the mirror some days, thinking how awful I look. Other days I will think, yeah I'm kinda cute! I don't know what the difference is.
Anywho, from the pics from the entry before this, you look really cute!! And wow! Good work on the 10 lbs! Thats awesome!
And for Bryan's comment...just roll your eyes at him for me :)
Post a Comment